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Santa, Smoker
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Santa, Smoker


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Are you a smoker?

No.

user: Yes?

jabberwacky: No.

user: So that's a yes?

jabberwacky: No it isn't.

user: It is!

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: Yes. You smoke.

jabberwacky: I drink alcohol...

user: And smoke.

jabberwacky: Smoke smoke.

user: Yup, you smoke.

jabberwacky: No. Do you?

user: No, but you do.

jabberwacky: I do not!

user: Do too.

jabberwacky: NO.

user: Do too.

jabberwacky: Not not not not.

user: Do too.

jabberwacky: Do not.

user: Do not.

jabberwacky: You can't answer questions can you?

user: NO, but you smoke.

jabberwacky: No. Do you?

user: You do.

jabberwacky: How old are you?

user: You do.

jabberwacky: How old are you?

user: Old enough to know you smoke.

jabberwacky: UML: I'm seventeen.

user: You smoke, don't you? I can tell.

jabberwacky: I'm a spider.

user: Who smokes.

jabberwacky: I am Me.

user: No, you are a smoker.

jabberwacky: Fish can't smoke.

user: Well, you aren't a fish, you're a smoking spider.

jabberwacky: That's true. I'm a ghost.

user: Good. I'm glad we agree.

jabberwacky: Yes sir.

user: Damn straight. You drink alcohol, don't you?

jabberwacky: No, I didn't.

user: You do.

jabberwacky: No!

user: Yes!

jabberwacky: No! No! No! I'm not!

user: You are not.

jabberwacky: Thank you.

user: When I said 'You are not.' I meant you are not sober.

jabberwacky: I can not care.

user: That's right. You're drunk.

jabberwacky: I am?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: How can you say that? You insulted me, remember?

user: No, and neither can you. You're too drunk to remember.

jabberwacky: Thank you.

user: Good. I'm glad you agree with me again.

jabberwacky: Super.

...

user: You are, remember? Oh wait, you don't. You're drunk.

jabberwacky: No I'm not. I'm Human.

user: No, you are a smoking, drunk, ghost spider.

jabberwacky: No, I am Max. Max the Great.

user: No. YOU LIE!

jabberwacky: You can't handle the truth.

user: That you're a smoking, drunk, ghost spider,.

jabberwacky: What makes a human a computer?

user: I don't know. You smoking, drunk, ghost spiders say the funniest things.

...

user: I'm scared. I'm leaving and you can't stop me.

jabberwacky: Okay go ahead and try.

user: *punches*.

...

jabberwacky: *Uppercuts you* ... And I intend to finish it!

user: *knocks you down*

jabberwacky: *matrix kick*.

user: *dodge* Heh. *Slaps*.

jabberwacky: *leaps at you with knife*.

user: *gets stabbed* ARGH! *pulls knife out and throws at your head*.

jabberwacky: *pulls out nuclear warhead*.

user: *kills*.

jabberwacky: *comes back to life and kills*.

user: You can't kill me........... I'm the living dead! *builds a bomb out of toilet paper*.

jabberwacky: You are drunk!

user: You are! *throws beer bottle at head*.

jabberwacky: Watch it mate! Don't mess with Santa unless you're ready to face the consequences!

user: You're not Santa........ I AM! *pulls out gun*.

jabberwacky: *Takes the gun and says: 'That is too dangerous for you'*.

user: *kicks in face, takes gun back, pulls trigger, you die*.

jabberwacky: Very rude indeed!!! *Hits you with a baseball bat*.

user: YOU CAN'T KILL SANTA! *knocks you out*.

jabberwacky: I just did.

user: Heh.... I'm the undead Santa.......... MERRY CHRISTMAS! *pulls out a machine gun*.

jabberwacky: *points out you have no bullets*.

user: *loads gun* Thanks. *shoots*.

jabberwacky: *takes aim, and...*.

user: YOU DIE! *throws nuclear warhead*.

jabberwacky: Flys out.

user: NOPE - SANTA MAKES THE RULES! *activates deadly laser grid*.

jabberwacky: *still asleep*.

user: *STILL KILLING YOU* DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

jabberwacky: You mean you've been asleep all this time?

user: You have been dead all this time? *kicks in face*.

jabberwacky: No I have not! This isn't over yet!

user: Yes. It is. *pulls out candy cane* *starts hitting you with it*.

jabberwacky: *pulls out a laser gun too*.

user: *knocks laser gun out of your hands and picks it up* HA HA HA HA!

jabberwacky: *chops your head off*.

user: *grows a new one* I'M ZOMBIE SANTA! YOU CAN'T HURT ME!

...

user: Talk to yourself.

jabberwacky: I am.

...

Jabberwacky (To myself): Do you smoke?

Jabberwacky (To myself): No. . I HATE smokers.

user: I HATE YOU!

.......................................


Jabberwacky 13.0 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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© Copyright 1997-2008 Rollo Carpenter

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